As winter in Boston drew to a close, I eagerly awaited the upcoming wiffleball season. I tried and
failed to ride the exercise bike regularly, but I am still glad I have it as it has become my cat's favorite sleeping
location. With exercise out of the question, I asked myself what I could do to improve for the coming year. After
all, I had crossed the 30 year-old mark and it isn't likely that my reflexes, quickness or power will improve much as I careen
toward death at an alarming rate.
After some long brainstorming with the cat perched atop the bike, he recommended that I remove
some of the dead weight from around my waist (and neck). Having once gone 13 days eating nothing but pie, bread, cheese,
vanilla zingers and Little Debbie snack cakes, I didn't think much of my chances. My first inclination was to tell the
cat to go [REDACTED] itself. He has a bit of a gut on him as well, and from what I can tell
he mostly sleeps.
But in the end I gave it a shot, and, having managed to achieve levels of anorexia that would make
the Olsen twins jealous, I lost 50 pounds. So heading into the first tournament of the year I was feeling great and
ready to go. The weight loss had my knees feeling better than ever, and I was ready to play without 4 braces for the
first time ever. Maybe that would finally put me over the top. After all, I have been at this for over 5 years
now and I am not nearly as good as I had hoped I would be. I suppose I am not as terrible as I feared, but I didn't
get into this to be mediocre. I got into this because it is the closest thing to a sport I play with two blown-out knees.
So the Animal was ready. Lou's Diamonds were ready. Wifflers from across New England were
ready. Bring on the tournaments, bring on the fun days of wiffleball, friendly trash-talk and sunshine.
But a funny thing happened on the way to our breakout season. Where was the sun, where were the tournaments,
and why the hell was Doom winning every freaking tournament in which they played?
For a while it seemed like the tournament schedule was expanding so rapidly that soon I would be able to
play every week from May until September. I still believe that interest in wiffleball is expanding, but the tournament
schedule is becoming more of a jumbled mess. There have been several weeks with no tournaments, or with tournaments
with limited entries that freeze many teams out. There are other weeks with two or more tournaments on the same day,
splitting what is already a limited participant base.
The guys at NEWA have been running great tournaments for years, but they have scaled back their schedule.
The Mass. Wiffle Association is but a fond memory. Big League Wiffleball burst on the scene last year, and Nick and
J-Rod are as enthusiastic about wiffleball as anyone I have met. But this year they have held more podcasts and bar
crawls than tournaments. I love all of the work they have done to promote the game, but I love playing in tournaments
more, and they appear to be holding fewer events this year. Wifflerock, once a tournament that could draw well over
100 teams, has been annoying players for years and participation in their event has been on the decline. I wonder if
their decision to postpone this year's event at the last minute to a date that conflicts with other events will be the
straw that breaks the camel's back. Wiffle-Up has yet to hold an event in New England, and its decision to eliminate
on-site registration may concern wiffle veterans who do not want to prepay given Wiffle-Up's somewhat high cancellation/postponement
rate. I am not trying to speak negatively about Wiffle-up, as I learned last year than any comment regarding their organization
that could be perceived as negative may be met with an enthusiastic but misguided and decidedly hostile response. I
am merely pointing out that it seems odd that an organization with a reputation for canceling or postponing events at the
last minute would find it wise to demand prepayment.
I wish that the leaders of these circuits could get together and do a better job of scheduling, and I know
that many of them try, but with the horrible weather we have had, the number of different people holding tournaments and other
considerations such as field availability, I suppose the "perfect" schedule is probably not possible.
Fortunately, as some other organizations are scaling back, Adam "The Steve" Sears has moved to fill the
void with his HRL tournaments. The HRL (Home Run League) has been operating in Baldwinville,
MA for twenty years now, offering a unique blend of traditional wiffleball and baseball (real base running) in both pick-up
and league formats. More recently, The Steve decided to branch out and begin holding traditional tournament events (thankfully,
with no base-running). The events are always fun, and the HRL tournament circuit quickly began drawing regular tournament
teams. This year, HRL partnered with NEWA and will be hosting this year's New England Medium Pitch Championships for
the top 24 teams as determined by performance in qualifying events across New England.
In keeping with this year's disturbing trend, the forecast called for rain on June 20th, the date of the
second HRL tournament of the year. I didn't care. The Steve thoughtfully confirmed to all players that the tournament
was a go, rain or shine, and I was ready to go, even if the wet field sent me home on crutches. Rumor has it that The
Steve sacrificed Joe Love in an ancient and secret ceremony to keep the rain at bay. I can't confirm that, but for whatever
reason the wiffle gods finally gave us a break, and the day was mostly dry. As usual, the tournament produced some high
quality wiffleball. By way of summary, I will briefly comment (okay, my comments are almost never brief) on some of
the teams in attendance.
Team HRL- The Steve and his team made a gallant effort,
and The Steve proved once again that he is a dangerous hitter. However, the lack of a quality pitcher doomed the HRL
squad and a walk-off from Kevin McHugh from Norwegian Wood in the round robin cost HRL a playoff spot.
Lou's Diamonds- It looked like a lost season when star
defender and #1 pitcher Test blew an ACL at last year's Wiffle-Up World Finals while making a jump at a ball that cleared
the fence by about 64 feet. But with the help of a very expensive knee brace that I covet, Test has rebounded in a major
way and overcome his Tony Allen moment. He may not be able to cover the field as he once did, but his pitching has evolved
to the point where he can keep us in any game against any team. Close losses in the round robin to Absolute Gunners
and Ego Squad kept our seeding low, but we responded with a very nice 4-0 playoff win over #4 seed Wiff This before bowing
out to Doom in the next round. Terminator played through badly hurt ribs and Test pitched his ass off, but it takes
a super-human effort to keep that lineup off the board for 6 full innings. Doom sent the Diamonds packing with an 8-4
win that was competitive to the final out.
Wiff This- This team was comprised of all-star HRL players,
and they did their league proud. A mix of solid pitching and scary hitting led them to very impressive round robin wins
over ManBearPig (2-0) and Doom (6-0), earning them the #4 playoff seed. Despite dropping a tight 4-0 game to the Diamonds
in the playoffs, their earlier wins leave no doubt that this team can be a factor in future tournaments. They may have
even made a last-inning comeback if not for two consecutive stabs on line drives from the Animal that would have made Andy
Moog proud. Classic blind squirrel finding the nut. I tried not to smile and pretended that I do that sort of
thing all the time. I don't.
Blind Faith- This team appeared to be new to tournament
wiffleball, and I know little about them. Their pitcher appeared to be the star of the team, particularly at the plate.
His 3 home runs allowed them to steal a game from the overconfident Diamonds in the round robin, earning them a playoff spot.
Unfortunately, their prize was a first-round match-up with Doom which did not go the distance.
Whitey Whackers- The Whackers have been on the circuit
for many years, and they are a consistent bunch, led by star pitcher Andy Grady and his brother Joe, known far and wide for
his powerful bat. However, the Whackers have been forced to play more frequently without Andy Grady since he got married.
Rumor has it that the rest of the squad has been watching "Saving Silverman" for ideas on how to handle the situation.
Amazingly, the Whackers have shown that they are bigger than any one player, and terrorized the round robin, earning the #3
seed. The dream came to an end with a tough quarterfinal loss to the Chicopee Bombers (5-2), but if the Whackers are
playing this well without their ace, they are going to be downright scary with a full team.
Plastic Jihad- I first came across this collection of
young HRL players last year and, perhaps unfairly, labeled them as excessive celebrators. As they have become more involved
in tournament wiffleball, several things have become clear. The Jihad boys can already play, and they are getting
better. More importantly, they are a classy group and it is obvious that my initial impression was incorrect.
I enjoy playing with them, and as they become more acclimated to top-level tournament play, they are going to become a team
to beat at some point. This year they have made the move to the elite Goldenstick Wiffleball League (www.goldenstickwifflecom), and the competition they face there should accelerate their development. This day, however, did not
belong to them. Despite handing Wiff This their only round robin loss (a trick even Doom couldn't turn), Jihad exited
in the first round of the payoffs after a tight loss to the Chicopee Bombers. They didn't win the tournament, but they
still have one of the funniest names in wiffleball.
Absolute Gunners- If you play wiffleball, you know the
Gunners. Last year was a monster season for them, as they finished in the money numerous times. Lefty Chris Merrifield
is a star in the outfield and second-year team member Gerry Calca is among the best hitters in the game. However,
since the departure of ace pitcher Junker to the deep south, this team goes as far as new ace pitcher, Matt McHugh, can take
them. McHugh has obviously performed well in spots, and every time his pitching is of any quality you are likely
to see the Gunners in the final 4. However, McHugh lacks confidence on the mound and has been known to struggle
when forced to adhere to the speed limit. Even more disturbing is McHugh's trend of begging off the mound
in pressure situations. When the going gets tough, one or two walks will have McHugh looking for an excuse to leave
the mound. He continued his trend at this tournament, and it cost the Gunners dearly. After dominating
the round robin, the Gunners drew a tough Ego Squad team in the quarterfinals. By mid-game, McHugh was looking
for a hole to crawl in to and teammate (and non-pitcher) Merrifield was left on the mound to try to contain an explosive offensive
team. Merrifield is a great hitter. Merrifield is a spectacular outfielder. Merrifield is NOT a pitcher.
One can only wonder what he and Calca were thinking as the tournament slid from their grasps courtesy of a 8-6 loss the
the Ego Squad. It was sad to see because based on history the Gunners were undoubtedly the #2 team in the tournament,
but they didn't win all of those previous tournaments with Merrifield on the mound. The Gunners are a one-pitcher team,
and when the going gets tough that one pitcher needs to man up, take the ball and get the job done.
Norwegian Wood- While Matt McHugh is known for running
for cover when the going gets rough, the only way his younger brother will leave the mound is in a body bag. Kevin McHugh
has been the leader of Norwegian Wood in several incarnations. I have seen him win games with friends who have never
played before. I have seen him win games with his girlfriend. I have seen him win games as a one-man team.
He has no quit in him, and he is a talented player. His latest teammate proved capable at the plate, and that was all
McHugh needed to get deep into this tournament. After manning the mound in wins against Whitey Whackers, 2 Screws Loose,
and HRL, Wood earned the #1 playoff seed. After a spirited quarterfinal win over the up-and-coming Game Over, McHugh
finally ran out of gas in a mercy-rule loss to Doom in the final four. Still, it was an impressive performance, and
the younger McHugh stayed on the mound for the duration. One wonders in the other members of the Absolute Gunners are
considering trading the older McHugh for the younger and more mentally-tough brother.
EGO Squad- If you look at the draw for most of the major
tournaments in New England, you are likely to see the Ego Squad. If you find them in your division, you may want to
consider wearing a helmet in the field. Add a top-notch pitcher and energetic defense to their ability to bash
the ball, and there in no question why they have seen so much success. However, a mysterious injury left them
without their ace for this tournament. This could have been an excuse to roll over and mail it in, but like the
Whitey Whackers, the rest of the Ego Squad stepped up big-time. After a notable win over the Gunners in the quarters,
the bats went uncharacteristically silent in the semis, where they dropped a 4-0 decision to the Chicopee Bombers. Despite
that, it was an impressive performance from a good team that was not at full strength.
Chicopee Bombers- This team hasn't played many tournaments,
but the have been more active recently with fantastic results. Their play in the first HRL tournament earned them
the #1 seed going to the playoffs, and a disappointing loss had them hungry for more. This time around, the Bombers
were determined to go deep into the draw. Wins over Blind Faith, Absolute Gunners, Plastic Jihad and Whitey
Whackers sent the Bombers to the final 4, where they must have taken their pitching to another level, shutting out the
potent Ego Squad lineup. It was nearly a Cinderella story as the Bomber pushed Doom to the limit in the final before
succumbing 5-3. Playing Doom that tight is an impressive accomplishment on its own merits, but to do so after making
the final 2 in a field laden with talent is outstanding. There is no question that the Chicopee Bombers can make a real
impact on the wiffle scene, particularly if they start playing more frequently. In any event, hats off to them on taking
the runner-up spot.
Doom- In the end, there can be only one. Like so
many times before, the last team left standing was Doom. Having won nearly 100 tournaments, Doom rarely fails to capitalize
on an opportunity, and they proved once again that they were the class of the field. Without Dallas Mall, perhaps
the most devastating hitter in medium pitch wiffleball, Doom relied on Adam Trotta's experience and clutch hitting, and fast-pitch
standout Troy Parks' solid pitching, high energy defense and enthusiasm. Say what you want about Doom, but you can't
avoid the fact that there is not another team in New England that has even come close to entering the discussion of best all-time
team. Doom keeps getting older (particularly Trotta, Mall and the elusive and insane Togg), but they still show
no signs of slowing down. In fact, one could probably argue that Doom is off to its best start ever, having entered
8 tournaments this season, winning 7 (T-3 in the other). That's right folks, Doom has lost one solitary playoff game
all season. Every year there are new talented teams or veteran teams showing improvement. Every year there are
new, younger and more athletic challengers poised to dethrone the champs. Every year the Doom train keeps chugging along.
If you have seen (or more likely heard) me at the fields, you know that I don't kiss anyone's ass. Indeed, I have been
critical of Trotta in the past, particularly with regard to his treatment of teammates and his ever-expanding waistline.
But at the end of the day the simple fact remains that when it comes to medium pitch wiffleball, there is Doom and there is
everyone else, and the gap does not appear to be closing. I continue to hope that some of the younger teams continue
to develop so there can be a bit more parity at the top, but at this point I am still waiting. Love them or (more likely)
hate them, seven out of eight tournaments to start the year is just plain sick. Hopefully when Trotta finally gives
birth to the (long overdue) child he is carrying, it throws off his swing.
So that is the wrap-up. Another great HRL tournament filled with talented teams. Another
success. Sadly, another Doom victory. The future for HRL looks bright as teams chase ranking points across New
England, hoping to make the medium pitch championships. I have no doubt that when the HRL hosts the New England Finals,
The Steve will take full advantage of the chance to show off his quality product to the best teams New England
has to offer.
Stay tuned next week when I will discuss some rule changes that may benefit HRL tournaments, as
well as other items of interest to the wiffle community, including what happens when Lou's Diamonds head to Baldwinville on
an off day to challenge all comers. See you on the tournament trail.
-Animal
